Hard Times

 So currently we are in the midst of pandemic Covid19

It hit us early this year, March 2020 and we (Malaysian) went through months of recovering phases, protection measures, daily updates from the ministries and  a few months of lockdown (I cant recall which month). If not mistaken things get better on May but it hit us back on September till the moment I am updating it here. So here I am wfh at Melaka, safe and sound.

Tbh I am surviving from this be-at-home the longest I can recall since I'm employed. I pledge maximum I can stay here is 3 days because more that that it'll be stormy and disagreements with mum (most of it) and... it takes a lot out of me. I'm gonna be here a months plus. Hope before new year I'll be able to be back in Shah Alam. So for now, I'll just endure it and focus on whats best. 

Staying here with family makes me ponder a lot. You know when u're away, u miss that missing part at home. And when you're at home, your thoughts longing about things in Shah Alam. Its disturbing, really and you just dont fell enough. Like whats wrong. Just be there. Be present. Hence, I am trying hard not to feel its a mistake being here the longest. 

I also ponder on what kind of person/wife/mother am I going to be. Weekends will be like shit storm here I tell you. Cause everyone is back at home and mum is always so grumpy and never enough and you just cant relate. It gets frustrated sometimes and I do feel like going back to Shah Alam and live with it. 

Why I complained a lot, I dont know.

Sometimes when I look at unfortunate ones, thats the reason to held back and embrace.

Hope things get better. Here.  

Pinky promise for new post every weekend. xx